The Battle of Stuff

There is a war going on in our home. It is a fierce battle which I am losing because the enemy out numbers me by many. Daily I struggle with the amount of things this family accumulates and, as of late, the kids are the biggest conspirators with the enemy.

Elves and Angels

Now, I get it, I'm a bit of a collector, I collect books and dishes. So I know the allure of having THINGS and I am not altogether against it. But we live in a ranch built on a concrete slab, with no accessible attic space and only 2 med sized closets to store all the stuff people with basements or garages store stuff in.

Already at 3.5 and 14 months my kids have boat loads of toys. Plastic things that light up, make noise and are just generally annoying. But the fact that these things are taking up precious space in my house is actually my second problem with much of it.

Every time one of my kids gets a toy that moves on its own, talks on its own and essentially plays for them, I think of the quote, "active toys make passive children." (One I have read many times, but cannot find anyone to attribute it to.) I am so on board with this. It's gotten to the point where my kid asks for me to change the batteries in toys that don't even have batteries. He wants everything to make noise or light up. And I really don't like it.

If my house was filled with toys that promoted imagination and true play, I don't think I would care as much about how little space we have. My dream play space for them (pictured) is full of toys made of natural materials that assist in their play, not dictate it.

Here's the problem though: these toys are expensive. Although I was inspired the other day to just sell all of the plastic, made-in-China crap that they have now and use the money to buy creative and sturdily designed new things. But...I think that might be a little traumatic, at least for my son.

The other problem, and probably the bigger one...and maybe I can't call it a problem, more of an issue... is that we are VERY lucky to have a huge family who love my kids more than anything and they revel in seeing their faces light up when presented with shiny trinkets. And, don't get me wrong, I like it too. Kids getting gifts, so fun! It's just after the fact, when I'm throwing another broken plastic toy away because they are made so poorly, that I start to think maybe I should totally be one of those super controlling people who dictate how and what people gift my kids. But I just don't think that's me.

And the battle wages on...

Looking for some inspiration for replacing some of your dictator toys? I was too, so I made a Pinterest board. Check it out. 

Fight! For Our Right! To...Nurse In Public

Yesterday my mom and I had a long gChat about how Americans need to rise up and do something about the general low wages most people in this country get paid. We need to lose the "you're lucky to have a job at all" mentality that employers spoon feed us so CEOs can have ginormus paychecks while the middle class slowly melts away and demand a living wage for all. She seemed pretty confident that the turning point will be sooner than later and got all "revolucion!" on me. I took a more cynical view, maybe a lot more cynical.

I think my exact quote was, "The majority of people in this country aren't paying attention or they don't care. They just want to be left alone with their guns, Mountain Dew and diabetes."

Daaaam, right? Harsh words for my fellow countrymen. Well I mean it...sometimes.

I witnessed something last night that made me take heart. Moms, standing up for other moms and their choices.

A mom in the Mama's Hip Facebook Group, Lacy Phillips, stated it nicely:

First of all, here's what went down for those not in the know: A young lady was nursing her infant, under a nursing cover, on a bench at Kentucky Kingdom while her older children rode a ride nearby. A young male staff member stood looking at her for some time, walked away, but soon returned with a young female staff member who told her that she needed to relocate to the restrooms if she wanted to continue feeding.

Let's be clear, this is a direct violation of Kentucky state law which states that a woman may breastfeed her baby or express breast milk in any location, public or private, and that any and all interference is prohibited. No stipulations are made in the law that require nursing covers be used, and there is legal protection from indecency laws written into the language of the law.

Simply put, a woman has the right to breastfeed her child in any location in the state of Kentucky, and can do so in the manner she sees fit even it that means leaving her bare breast exposed. And no one can interfere with a woman exercising this right. Period.

Throughout the day, Kentucky Kingdom has been deleting comments from their Facebook page that ask for clarification regarding their policies on breastfeeding, informing the company of state laws, and criticizing their apparent ignorance of the issue and unfriendliness to the young woman asked to stop breastfeeding in the park.

From the moment the mother who had this experience posted on the Facebook group, which has over 2,200 members, many from Louisville and Southern, IN; moms started giving Kentucky Kingdom a piece of their minds via Facebook and Twitter. Clearly, much to the chagrin of Kentucky Kingdom since they deleted most of the largely polite comments. The office number of the President of the park was circulated around and voice mails, expressing disappointment at the policy, were encouraged. Within a couple of hours a nurse-in was organized, with an official Facebook invite and everything. The Louisville pro-breastfeeding community was on top of it! 

After a few false starts by their PR team that just incited the rightfully angry mamas, Ed Hart, the President, issued this statement this morning: 

And the crowd goes wild! The community posted their thanks and appreciation for this mea culpa from Mr. Hart and the nurse-in was canceled. 

Now, this community of mothers, with whom I'm friends with many, is not exactly the demographic I was snarking about in my comments to my mom. But it was a well timed reminder to me that we can change things if we all work together. And I'm so proud that this is a group of women who are bringing up the next generation. 

Okay, now let's take this motivation and go fix some more things! A living wage would be a good place to start. 

P.S. I would encourage anyone who is into supporting and normalizing breast feeding to attend this Live, Love, Latch event in August. 

Update: Nurse-in may or may not be canceled. It seems up in the air right now. 

It's A Good Day For a New Year

I'm not one for resolutions. I think any time is a good time to start new habits. But 2014 is feeling extra fresh-starty to me. Perhaps it's because in 2013 I transitioned from being pregnant, to having a preemie to putting in my time as the mom of a baby under 6 months old - you parents know what I'm talking about. Those months can be brutal...although I have to say my little Marlowe took it pretty easy on us. Hillary became a father of two and went from being a stay-at-home-dad to working (more than) full time outside the house. And my little dude, Beckett, became a big brother and had to get used to not having his best pal, his dad, around to play with all the time. It was a year of constant change.

But 2014 will be different (as far as my crystal ball can see.) Now that we've completed our contribution to the family lineage, I feel a renewed claim on my body. I'll probably be nursing for a while, so there are no crazy nights out in my immediate future, but copious amounts of yoga and toning exercises are in the cards and I can't wait to feel the energy and healthy glow that comes with that.

We're still working out the logistics of being a family with two full time working parents, but the kinks are slowly melting away.

Marlowe is nearly 8 months old now! Her gestational age (can I still use that term?) is still only 6 months, but we are headed into that sweet spot of babydom that includes more scheduled and extended napping, going longer between meals, which means more sleep at night and, super cute stuff, like sitting up and trying solids.

The world feels fresh and new.

To commemorate that feeling Beck and I planted a tree on New Years day. The Honest Company - which I subscribe to for my monthly soap and family essentials - sent us a sweet little Cedar as a holiday surprise. I am continually impressed with that company and highly recommend all their products.

It waited patiently in it's nice little package for the crazy days of Christmas to be over. It was chilly out, but not too bad as long as we bundled up. Beckett loved pushing the dirt back into the hole with his shovel, but would not touch the dirt with his bare hands.

He was worried about it being too cold for the little tree. He has good instincts. I told him we'd bring the tree in and let it grow through the winter and then we'd bring it outside in the spring.

It's his job to water it when the soil feels dry - he makes me check, but has been very diligent about it.

Every so often he walks over, quietly examines it and says, "It's sure taking a long time to grow..."

Perhaps we'll make this a New Year's tradition.

Wishing you a wonderful 2014, full of fresh and new feelings.